My husband is very patient and sympathetic to my girly complaints. But just a few days ago we had a brief conversation that got me to thinking that as sympathetic as he is... he really doesn't know what we go through. Surprise, I know. He happened to be with me in the bathroom when I had just discovered it was that time of the month AGAIN. I groaned and complained, of course. This was our conversation:
Me: "Oh maaaan. I just got my period."
Me: "I hate getting my period. I'm so tired of getting my period."
Him: "Well, it doesn't last too long..."
Me: "What?! I've been getting my period for a long time. It sure feels like its been lasting a long time to me."
End of conversation. I wasn't even mad. Until I started thinking exactly how long it has been that I've been getting my period. And if I stacked all of those days together right in a row, how many days of my life so far have I spent having my period?
So I made the mistake and did the math.
30 years x 12 months in a year x 6 days average per period = 2,160 days.
To be fair, I'll subtract out the days that I didn't get my period because I was either pregnant or nursing, which turned out to be 276 days. I just knew those kids were good for something other than a tax deduction! ;) So....
2,160 - 276 = 1,884 days of cramping, bleeding, bloating, etc., feminine product hell
That's approximately 5 YEARS, 1 MONTH and 28 DAYS! And counting! And let me tell you, for the first 15 years--or 1080 days--of my menstruating life, approximately 180 days were spent in bed with the shakes, cold sweats, and vomiting misery. I used to be very ill that first day until I went on the pill at around 20 years old and then later had babies. Seriously, those first days were worse than the labor pains of both my girls added together--and my second birth was 100% natural as in no drugs, no IV, not even a heparin lock! 180 DAYS!!! The equivalent of six straight months of my life was spent feeling like that. IMAGINE IT'S LIKE I SURVIVED SIX MONTHS STRAIGHT LABOR PAINS WITHOUT AN EPIDURAL OR EVEN TYLENOL! And I'm just an average girl. I'm sure there are countless women who have or will have endured the same and worse than me as a result of something so simple and natural as menstruation.
I should have never done these calculations. Now I'm really pissed. At mother nature, or my husband, I'm not really sure.
I sat down at my laptop this morning, thinking I was going to email my husband the results of my calculations. I'll show him. But he emailed me first and sent me this [bookstore coupon] and told me he also left some cash for me on the dining room table from a camera lens he sold off craigslist yesterday. Awww. Maybe I'm not that mad at after all. Because tonight? I'M GOING SHOPPING!!!!!
And its good to be a girl, isn't it?